Sausage Dog Tape
Sausage dogs are the best make of dog and everyone knows it. Put it on some tape and team them up with your generosity (in the form of a gift... you can't just fein generosity!) and the only one who'll be in the doghouse... is the dog.
It's an entire 60 metres long, so even if you ARE as generous as you are trying to take credit for, it's probably gonna do your whole family's birthdays all year.